It is the bane of the modern world. The hernia, hereon referred to as "the condition formerly known as rupture"*, is a very painful condition, sometimes resulting in a bulge about the groin. Men riding on public transport are advised to wear a long shirt. Most painful is when exercising, defacating, or urinating—one must learn to perform these actions one at a time. A hernia may restrict circulation to vital organs. Care must be taken not to strangle the bowel, no matter how irritating it is. Hernias get worse during the day. Doctors recommend going to sleep while lying down.
* A veritable giant of the music world, an abnormal growth at any rate.
Villagers celebrate a new rupture belonging to the gentleman in the wheelbarrow—a common practice in the 1800s.
"But, Doctor, my hernia is down there."
"I'll examine it from here, you dirty sod."
The English used to send their hernias to Australia.
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