Announcement is made of the marriage of Miss Jeanette Siss, son of Harold and Annette Siss (known as the Sissies [sic]) and Osborn Valentine, son of Agnes Valentine and Cecil Baxter (the gentleman rose to the occasion [sic]).
Thanks to the wonders of science, the wedding took place Wednesday evening, during the height of the pandemic.
It is understood which the bridegroom is by the rampant metallic knocking emanating from his mid-region.
After a honeymoon in an hotel [sic] room with an extra-king-sized bed (social distancing), the couple is residing in Columbia.
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